Little Girls

  Before Riley, I had never wanted to have a little girl.  I don't get the make-up, dresses, princesses thing.  I don't like crowns, tiaras and all things sparkly.  Vomit.  I counted myself very lucky when my first was a boy.  He has always been in my comfort zone.  Rocks, mud, bugs (ok he hates bugs), trucks and trains.  Bring it on.

  But last night after my amazing 5-year-old son was in bed, I sat on the couch sobbing.  I cried because I missed my one and only girl.  I miss my daughter.  I want her to be here so I can dress her in a ridiculous tutu, so I can buy her some ridiculous Easter dress, so I can do her hair.  I crave the stupid sparkles, princess parties, petticoats, baby dolls and tea parties.

  I literally sobbed to my husband "I want a girl to dress in a tutu!"  Craziness.

  And here we are.  Not 24 hours later and I have some insane news to share.  We have been chosen by a birth mom to parent her baby girl who is due to come into this world on June 18, 2014.  That's 8 weeks away folks.

  I'm determined to jump into this full boar (even though I'm petrified.  So much can still go wrong).  I'm having a baby shower (I hate showers.....they are torture on Earth) and I actually WANT it.  I'm getting my house ready for my baby girl who is coming this Spring.  I'm buying her clothes, I'm telling everyone, I'm getting her room ready, I'm picking a name, I'm buying a damn carseat.

This in no way lessens my pain for my dear sweet Riley girl.  I love her.  I cry as I type this because I miss her so much.  And I intend to tell my second daughter all about her.